tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7525681114880195972024-02-20T10:50:20.031-08:00Sir Ferdinand's Strictly Unproffesional Internet OfferingsGreetings internet. I'm a writer not a webmaster, but generating interest in my work (or money for my food) irl has not been very win so I came here. I honestly have no idea what I'm doing. Hopefully this is entertaining for some of you, educational for me, or (god forbid) lucrative for me. Really accomplishing any of those will have to suffice.Sir Ferdinand/Falsor Wing/NyuuLucyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00436742744845559533noreply@blogger.comBlogger84125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-752568111488019597.post-15711115184077170692012-10-05T21:12:00.000-07:002012-10-05T21:12:21.816-07:00Qui-Gon Must Have Been Bad At Math...<ul>
<li>I've had this on my mind since The Phantom Menace came out and I've decided I can remain silent no longer.</li>
<ul>
<li>The reason Qui-Gon Jinn made a BFD about Anakin was because he thought he would fulfill an old Jedi prophesy.</li>
<li>This prophesy was a BFD for the Jedi and they seemed to regard the fulfilling of said prophesy as a good thing. </li>
<li>The Jedi counsel agreed that Qui-Gon might have been right, but was unsure about training Anakin anyway.</li>
<li>The prophesy was of "one who will bring balance to the force." This is the problem I have: as of the Naboo blockade crisis in the entire galaxy there were only 2 Sith and like a thousand fucking Jedi. WHY THE FUCK WOULD THEY WANT BALANCE?! THEY WERE WINNING! </li>
<ul>
<li>Mace Windu should have been like, "He may be the one to bring balance to the force... HOLY-COCK-SHIT-BALLS-ASS! WE NEED TO KILL THIS MOTHERFUCKING KID RIGHT NOW BEFORE HE CUTS OFF MY GODDAMNED HAND OR SOMETHING!"</li>
</ul>
</ul>
</ul>
<ul>
<li>The other thought I had was that any time Qui-Gon decides it would be a good idea to go out of his way to help someone without orders, don't help that person (or gungan) kill them; kill them immediately. </li>
</ul>
Sir Ferdinand/Falsor Wing/NyuuLucyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00436742744845559533noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-752568111488019597.post-8756557389422520132012-08-31T15:07:00.000-07:002012-08-31T15:07:37.654-07:00Bob Ross is a Sorceror<ul>
<li>Watching his show feels surreal, he'll look like he's smearing colors around at random then abruptly one of his dabs will turn the amorphous color blobs into a fucking tree lined meadow. One second his painting looks like a gorilla's finger painting and the next its a beautiful landscape it seriously wrinkles my brain.</li>
</ul>
Sir Ferdinand/Falsor Wing/NyuuLucyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00436742744845559533noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-752568111488019597.post-342410327981692262012-02-28T06:14:00.000-08:002012-02-28T06:14:00.644-08:00Nothing Woos Like Prose<ul><li>Of all the major forms of art prose seems like the least romantic.</li>
<li>Example: Poetry produced The Body Electric by Walt Whitman (lulz quivering love jelly). To cover the exact same topic prose has produced Greys Anatomy (a medical textbook).</li>
<li>Which seems the least likely to provoke a gushy emotional response?</li>
<ul><li>A love poem comparing the subjects eyes to the sky or diamonds and what have you.</li>
<li>A love song (pretty much the same as above with slightly less class and significantly more guitars and cliches)</li>
<li>A painting of the artist and his beloved on a hill looking at the stars or some crap</li>
<li>A five paragraph essay outlining the pros and cons of copulation with the paper's author. </li>
</ul><li>Actually I think that essay thing might work on the right girl. (Something tells me I should run that idea by my people first though.) </li>
<li>Fiction prose might work better than non-fiction now that I think about it, but it also seems like it would have a much higher chance of of being creepy as all hell. (Writing fan fiction about real people seems like it would be frowned upon and I'm pretty sure slash fiction counts as grounds for sexual harassment charges.)</li>
</ul>Sir Ferdinand/Falsor Wing/NyuuLucyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00436742744845559533noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-752568111488019597.post-43598358034291741882012-02-26T20:50:00.000-08:002012-02-26T20:50:01.159-08:00I Swear I'm Not An Asshole (I Think...)<ul><li>I do this thing where if I hear someone who speaks in an interesting manner I will subconsciously start imitating them (I think everyone does this but I do it to a greater extent than most.) This occasionally leads to situations my friends find hilarious where I seem like I'm making fun of people.</li>
<ul><li>The most memorable instance of this was one of the many times I ordered a pizza. When I order food I don't just give my order and get out (that's boring) I try and chat up the person I'm interacting with so my orders can take longer than normal. On this particular occasion the nice perky pizza hut employee had the most pronounced ridiculous lisp I have ever heard. When I had finished ordering my friends were giggling and giving me the expression I have learned means I just did something hilarious without realize it. I asked what it was and immediately realized (only then) that I was speaking with a RIDICULOUS lisp. I asked how quickly I had started doing it and they said I had spoken to her like that for 90% of the order.</li>
<li>I bring this up now because today I watched The Godfather Part I and Short Circuit back to back today and have had to constantly stop myself from speaking in an increasingly bizarre manner.</li>
<li>"You come to me on this the day of my daughters wedding and you say to me, 'Don Corleone I need input...'"</li>
<ul><li>How the fuck do you punctuate a quote within a quote?</li>
</ul></ul><li>Big Big news, two whole people actually commented on one of my posts! They were both positive (which you could have read for yourself but i felt like saying it anyway). One of them said it is very helpful to him and he has learned a lot which is an enormous surprise (and mildly confusing) to me.</li>
<ul><li>I can only assume he/she/it/them mean they have learned about writing from me which would make me oh so very happy and surprised (and a little bit afraid for them; I'm not exactly Heinlein)</li>
<li>Happy Note: the post box's spell check actually has the correct spelling of Heinlein.</li>
</ul><li>In writing related news there have been a few developments:</li>
<ul><li>I finally decided on a new years resolution: to write every single day (no exceptions) even if it is totally unrelated to any of my current book projects. I decided improving myself as a writer was more important than trying to force myself to complete projects.</li>
<ul><li>I think stipulating that I don't have to advance a current project will make it far more likely that I actually follow through on this vow.</li>
<li>I also think that having a vow I will stick to will in the end make me far more likely to end up working on actually finishing projects.</li>
</ul><li>On Thursday night/Friday morning I wrote an entire outline for a brand new novel from scratch.</li>
<ul><li>It has all the parts a beginning, a middle, even an end (which I can usually never come up with.)</li>
<li>Having said all that it isn't very in depth (its only 920 words), and I think the end is kind of weak.</li>
<li>I have writen several other book outlines and then never (as of yet at least) done anything with them, but I think I'm going to commit myself to this one and try and actually hammer out a full manuscript for it rather than just fiddle around with it for a while before moving on because: </li>
<ul><li>A: At the moment I'm not heavily working on any other project (other than slowly going through Modsoldiers and cleaning it up line by line).</li>
<li>B: I like the main characters I've developed for for it, and for science fiction and fantasy (this one is low fantasy) I think the characters, more than the plot, are what make or break a good novel.</li>
</ul><li>I'm going to try and do something new with this project which is tell it in a non-linear fashion i.e. start about half way through the story and reveal the first half through occasional flashbacks.</li>
<ul><li>I think this will make the story much more interesting by creating more suspense/drama/what have you by making the reader wonder about previous events and the characters motivations. Also it should make the characters seem much more dynamic by juxtaposing scenes taking place at wildly different points in time. The changes in a character between scenes taking place at different points in the plotline should show far greater contrast than between scenes taking place one right after the other.</li>
</ul><li>I'm also going to try something fairly new with perspective. Typically I write from an omniscient 3rd person point of view only occasionally poping into the mind of a character for a limited 3rd person perspective. For this book I'm planning on telling the whole thing from that limited third person perspective with each scene being from the POV of one of the characters in it.</li>
<li>My project name for this book is MartArt2. Yes I already have a project named simply MartArt (it is actually one of those outlines I completed, didled with for 2 days then never returned too) but this project is so different I felt it needed a different title.</li>
</ul></ul></ul>Sir Ferdinand/Falsor Wing/NyuuLucyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00436742744845559533noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-752568111488019597.post-53872586554560509602012-02-17T12:13:00.001-08:002012-02-26T20:52:37.671-08:00I Accidently The Silmarillion...<ul><li>Most all of my fantasy story projects take place in more or less the same fantasy world I've created.</li>
<ul><li>I've worked quite a lot on these stories but unlike other story projects which I more or less have one version of that get slowly refined over time the fantasy writing I do often ends up using some or all of the same characters to create totally different storylines often incorporating one or several of a number of various recurring scenes or story elements from one another. I quite like writing these but I find I really like only a certain specific scene or plot section from each story. In new stories I'll try to jam the various scenes, plot sections, and characters I liked from previous attempts all into the same plot. This leads to many rambling or disjointed plots as they can't all really be crammed together like that.</li>
<li>As I keep writing various different similar and dissimilar story attempts in this world I think I might be gradually moving closer to having a really neat epic story many years from now.</li>
<li>I enjoy working with the characters and having them interact with eachother in various different combinations.</li>
<li>The longer I play around with them the more good ideas I have and the more developed and refined the setting, characters, and so on become and hopefully one day I will be able to assemble theses elements into a real sweeping fantasy epic like the lord of the rings or (hopefully) a wheel of time that doesn't drag on.</li>
<li>I used to be frusterated with my inability to create a single solid plotline with these various elements but now it has become quite interesting and rather fun.</li>
<li>Even if I'm really not actually making any progress towards someday combining all these disparate ideas into some masterpiece the time I spend cranking out new scenes, characters, and plotlines is certainly great practice and making me a better writer.</li>
</ul><li>Hmmmm that was one of the more poorly explained streams of thought I've jotted down here (For Shame!) I hope it made some sense.</li>
</ul>Sir Ferdinand/Falsor Wing/NyuuLucyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00436742744845559533noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-752568111488019597.post-64680840619620711672011-12-29T03:34:00.001-08:002011-12-29T03:34:45.696-08:00Skyrim Anyone?<ul><li>The cake used to be a lie, but then it took an arrow in the knee.</li>
</ul>Sir Ferdinand/Falsor Wing/NyuuLucyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00436742744845559533noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-752568111488019597.post-68086433660543574452011-11-28T11:05:00.001-08:002012-02-28T06:18:42.342-08:00Oh Weyrleader, My Weyrleader<ul><li>My favorite writer Ann Mcaffrey died... I'm surprised how saddened I am by it. When Arthur C. Clark died I was like: <i>He was still alive?</i> but for the dragon master I feel like my surrogate mother just died. She will be missed.</li>
<li>I'm gonna have to redouble my own efforts to try and take up some of the slack her absence leaves.</li>
<li>Elizabeth Moon is hereby forbidden from dying ever.</li>
<li>In other famous author news I finally finished A Dance With Dragon the newest Game of Thrones book and was quite disappointed.</li>
<ul><li>Its not that it wasn't a good book, it was. It just doesn't compare with the others. Reading the first four books was like sex; reading this one was like... riding a swing set.</li>
<li>When I finished it and reflected back on some of the character and chapters he included my only reaction "What the fuck was that shit?"</li>
<li>In other places it kept setting the stage for really awesome things to happen and then being like "Psych! read the next one." I REFUSE TO PUT UP WITH THIS DRAGON BALL Z HORSESHIT!</li>
<li>(in this DBZ analogy the Dornish prince is defiantly Hercule the asshat who wastes entire episodes you thought were going to be about one of the real characters, you know the ones who are cool and I care about?)</li>
<li>Does anyone else ever wonder what happened to Rickon? I've considered writing a letter to Martin and reminding him that there was actually another Stark. Rosey the hooker had more follow up than poor Rickon and Shaggydog. (god bless HBO btw)</li>
</ul></ul>Sir Ferdinand/Falsor Wing/NyuuLucyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00436742744845559533noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-752568111488019597.post-68497584037049163922011-10-27T05:33:00.000-07:002011-10-27T05:40:17.580-07:00Short Story Experiment: Space Marines with Ray Guns Blowing Shit up for its Own Sake. (It will NOT be an allegory for Iraq it will be an allegory for Space Marines With Ray Guns Blowing Shit Up)<ul><li>Having finished my Modsoldiers first draft I can't do much anything more with the story until I've gotten some editing and feedback on it.</li>
<li>The next day when I went to write and realized I was (for the moment) done with the writing stage of Modsoldiers and should start working on one of my other projects. I found myself more than a little dumbfounded... Now what? I have so many stories I want to right.</li>
<li>I think this is the first time I've ever felt this kind of indecision because until now the only time I would stop working on one project was when I had some inspiration for some other story and started working on it.</li>
<li>I thought about perhaps going back to work on ME2S which is, next to Modsoldiers, the closest any of my books is to completion, but as long as I know I'll be turning my attention back to Modsoldiers in the hopefully near future I'm reluctant to dive back into another massive not-quite-all-sorted-out protonovel. Also I'm still rather burnt out on ME2S from my last stretch of working on it (i.e. I opened the folder for it on my computer, saw all of those horrifyingly familiar files, and was struck by the powerful urge to gouge my eyes out then set my myself on fire.)</li>
<li>So for the last couple of days I've just kind of toyed around with a bunch of fun ideas I've had kicking around but can't seem to wrangle into anything like a plot, or stared at my laptop and played minecraft.</li>
<li>Today however I recalled a conversation I had with my friend Jake (the one who shouldn't have dick skinning gloves) and have a new idea for what to write while struggling to get Modsoldiers cleaned up.</li>
<ul><li>I've often bemoaned my difficulty in writing short stories, which I've heard and read are vital to break into genera fiction, and on this particular day Jake said something along the lines of, "You know I'll bet you could write a pretty badass fight scene that was about the length of a short story. You know something along the lines of <u>No Disintigrations, Please</u>."</li>
<ul><li> <u>No Disintigrations, Please</u> is one of the better known Star Wars short stories (its in the compilation Tales from the New Republic). It doesn't have too much in the way of mind blowing plotting or painting a brilliant tapestry of multidimensional characters. What it does have is Boba Fett kicking a helluvalot of ass. The story is that Boba has a target who's protective elder brother is the commander of a full blown imperial planetary garrison. Boba Fett vs. an entire imperial garrison: fight! </li>
</ul><li>This is an interesting idea to me because while I worry that a story that is light on plot and character in exchange for being heavy on hardcore ass whupping isn't what editors are looking for, I am good at writing and choreographing cool fight scenes, and I can create them fairly easily.</li>
<li>To make a long story short I've started a second short story tentatively titled, either <u>Assault Drop</u> or<u> Combat Drop.</u></li>
<ul><li>I've always wanted to write a full scale combat drop by sci-fi power suit wearing ass kicking space marines; think John Steakly's Armor meets Saving Private Ryan. Now I am.</li>
</ul></ul></ul>Sir Ferdinand/Falsor Wing/NyuuLucyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00436742744845559533noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-752568111488019597.post-10956473379404183732011-10-20T20:10:00.000-07:002011-10-20T20:31:06.769-07:00The Take-No-Prisoners-Yes-Even-the-Younglings Juggernaught of Pakistani Industry<ul><li>This is something that has bothered me for years: why in the hell is every goddamn soccer ball in the world from Pakistan?</li>
<ul><li>How could this have come to be and why has it stayed this way?</li>
</ul><ul><li>I would have thought that at least India would maintain some kind of soccer ball production base to ensure their internal supply of soccer balls could be maintained if they're already volatile relationship with their neighbor worsened and the Pakis began a full scale soccer ball embargo.</li>
</ul><li>Having written all that down I feel almost certain I've started down the road to being the next Tom Clancy, I'll bet he saw something like this and that was where the idea for Hunt for the Red October or Clear and Present Danger came from. I can see it now: new best seller <b><u>Rogue Cell: The Football Agenda</u></b></li>
<li>I hope saying Pakis doesn't get me put on some sort of list or go all Salman Rushdie on me.</li>
<ul><li>Now that I think about it though if no one had ever seen or heard of the Satanic Verses it probably wouldn't have caused such a stink so I think I'll be fine unless those few noble russians I spoke of the other day or, god forbid, Sally the Imaginary Hypothetical Blog Reader, put out some kind of fwata alert on me.</li>
</ul><li> Man us atheists miss out on all the cool vocab religions get; Islam has Fwata's and Jihads, and even the catholics get stuff like transubstantiation and excommunication (which sounds like a big ass sci-fi space gun or something; seriously if Moff Tarkin had said, "Transubstantiate the Excommunicator!" instead of lame old, "You may begin the demonstration." Leia probably woulda talked; that shit sounds scary.</li>
<ul><li>We do get Apostate though which sounds kind of badass. (Note to other atheists: the word apostate is like tyrannosaur urine to a Christian, one whiff of it and even Mormon missionaries will shy away from your territory.</li>
<ul><li>Catholic: "My title is lay person."</li>
</ul><ul><li>Me: "Nice to meet you, my title is <u><b>apostate</b></u> *boom crakooom crash!*"</li>
</ul><ul><li>Catholic: "My god! So... many... syllables and hard... consonants..."</li>
</ul><ul><li>Second Catholic: "I think I just shat myself." </li>
</ul></ul></ul>Sir Ferdinand/Falsor Wing/NyuuLucyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00436742744845559533noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-752568111488019597.post-55449133646794922752011-10-19T12:20:00.000-07:002011-10-19T14:12:59.189-07:00Concerning Bacta<ul><li>There comes a time in every man's life when, due to a set of circumstances far to embarrassing to ever explain to anyone, he finds his crotch in terrible need of a bacta tank. When that time comes the man is, unfortunately, totally fucked because bacta isn't real.</li>
<li>There's no particular reason I'm mentioning this now though; none at all.</li>
<li>I finally rediscovered the edit post button and in finding it I am only more confused as to how I could have failed to find it.</li>
<li>Apparently 14% of my blogs page views last months were by Russians (or at least people in Russia), clearly my philosophies have a broader appeal than anyone had thought.</li>
<li>Everyone had thought they had no appeal anywhere to anyone, but 8 Russians proved them wrong by virtue of they probably ended up here on accident.</li>
</ul>Sir Ferdinand/Falsor Wing/NyuuLucyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00436742744845559533noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-752568111488019597.post-4181917400249366062011-10-16T17:51:00.000-07:002011-10-16T17:51:01.316-07:00Musings<ul><li>It seems odd to me but now when I read back over this blog it seems better than I've ever thought it was before. Sad that I feel this now after everyone has stopped reading it (Except Sally the hypothetical imaginary blog reader).</li>
<li>I enjoy the game minecraft alot, in fact my map (I only have one) Legionholm is something I'm rather proud of. Legionholm is a full blown castle, not like other minecraft castles I've seen it is massive (its curtain walls are more than a kilometer in diameter) and its got amenities and what not. instead of a keep that is hollow or just contains a bunch of impressive architecture my keep actually has the barracks, kitchens, privy, equipment storage etc for a 2,000 man garrison. I might post pics and such here at some point.</li>
<li>I've been having trouble writing for the last couple of days, I just feel terribly unmotivated to do anything, it is causing me quite a lot of concern.</li>
</ul>Sir Ferdinand/Falsor Wing/NyuuLucyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00436742744845559533noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-752568111488019597.post-46226037708755132622011-10-04T08:29:00.000-07:002011-10-04T08:29:33.299-07:00<ul><li>I kind of wish I had someone to share this with that would be as excited about this as I am, sadly the huzzahs of Sally the imaginary hypothetical blog reader aren't quite cutting it.</li>
<li>I can't even go drink to celebrate because alcohol interacts with some of my meds leaving me 85% asleep for the next week which isn't quite worth it.</li>
<li>"Shrugs"</li>
</ul>Sir Ferdinand/Falsor Wing/NyuuLucyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00436742744845559533noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-752568111488019597.post-70432422553096693352011-10-04T05:03:00.000-07:002011-10-20T20:43:30.296-07:00!HOLY SHIT!<ul><li>I finally actually finished a rough manuscript for Modsoldiers all the way! Huzzah!</li>
<li>Unfortunately now comes the nastier bits of trying to publish a novel: A: first I'll need someone to edit it (copy editing and content screening) I'll probably end up having to pay someone if I ever want the whole thing to ever get a thorough going over. and B: submitting the edited manuscript to one publisher after another (one at a time of course), waiting for their response, and praying that they'll actually respond for good or ill sometime before the heat death of the universe.</li>
<li>Writing the manuscript I'm only constrained by my own abilities and work ethic but these steps will depend completely on cooperation from others, something I can bank on never getting.</li>
</ul>Sir Ferdinand/Falsor Wing/NyuuLucyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00436742744845559533noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-752568111488019597.post-42727873543468865512011-09-01T19:53:00.000-07:002011-09-01T19:53:46.654-07:00I Think I May Finally See Why Trekkies are Perceived as "Weirdos"<ul><li>My second favorite line of dialogue from Star Trek Voyager: "Get the cheese to sick bay. Have the doctor look at it as soon as possible."</li>
<li>It's only so memorable because getting that cheese to sick bay really was a big fucking deal.</li>
</ul>Sir Ferdinand/Falsor Wing/NyuuLucyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00436742744845559533noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-752568111488019597.post-18853959504287192822011-06-21T23:39:00.000-07:002011-06-21T23:39:01.160-07:00Fuck Career Builder<ul><li>The only job offer I've received through their <i>excellent </i>services was actually a check cashing scam; apparently these cock suckers think the the only thing I'm qualified for is getting robbed.</li>
<li>The depressing part is that I have the suspicion that that <i>is </i>all I'm qualified for.</li>
<li>I'm officially adding Career Builder to the list of places I'm gonna fucking burn down when I finally have my break down.</li>
</ul>Sir Ferdinand/Falsor Wing/NyuuLucyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00436742744845559533noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-752568111488019597.post-59416021802897141072011-01-20T17:29:00.000-08:002011-10-29T00:39:42.985-07:00Competence?<ul><li>Apparently I have forgotten how to edit an already posted post, all I can remember about editing old posts is that I used to know how to do it and that it was blindingly obvious how.</li>
<li>I'm just mature enough to wish that I'd posted twice more in 2010.</li>
<li>I wish flinging poop was socially acceptable; monkeys always look so confident when they're flinging their shit around. Seriously it's like they're James Dean and shit flinging is their cigarette and blue jeans. I don't smoke cause lung cancer and death make writing difficult (though it does make one's writing far more lucrative), but I feel like throwing my poop is a much better alternative.</li>
<li>"What are you up to Tom?"</li>
<li>"Nothing much, just crouching here flinging some shit around."</li>
<li><i>Man, Tom's so smooth and popular with the ladies maybe I should be throwing poop everywhere too. Plus it would be cheaper than buying a car.</i></li>
</ul>Sir Ferdinand/Falsor Wing/NyuuLucyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00436742744845559533noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-752568111488019597.post-72614403224464377762011-01-20T17:24:00.000-08:002011-10-20T20:44:08.018-07:00Does Writing Make Everyone Bipolar?<ul><li>When I'm writing a lot (which I am right now) I inevitably end up having one of two opinions about my writing and chances for sucess. Either A: "I AM A SHINING GOLDEN GOD!" OR B: "I should really just slit my wrists now for efficiencies sake." Objective analysis of my writing is absolutely impossible, I think I see now why becoming a parent turn you into a nutcase.</li>
<li>I really like the bullet point format for my posts here, but this time I only really have that one comment and having a bullet point list with only one bullet point just looks sad so I've added this bullet point about making an extra bullet point.</li>
<li>It's now clear to me that this blog really is worth everyone's time... totally.</li>
</ul>Sir Ferdinand/Falsor Wing/NyuuLucyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00436742744845559533noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-752568111488019597.post-15383534417176041322010-12-24T03:05:00.000-08:002011-10-20T20:44:43.434-07:00Book Update (Modsoldiers)<ul><li>Recently I've been working really had on Modsoldiers, the oldest and furthest along of the novels I'm writing. I finished a very rough draft and began parsing through it line by line scene by scene chapter by chapter rewriting, clarifying, and generally improving it. I think I made the revised sections easier to understand, more entertaining, and much better integrated onto the story as a whole. There were two or three sections I ended up leaving to come back to later because I just couldn't seem to get them right; this was a great idea because then I was able to make progress instead of letting those few sections take up all of my energy. Finally, aside from the afore mentioned ass pain sections I have reached the end of the novel. I quickly decided that rather than reworking the conclusion scenes I had I should essentially rewrite then end, I want the book to end on an exciting awesome high note rather than the fairly mediocre final battle and resolution I had.</li>
<li>Deciding to redo the end has been plaguing me for days no though as I knew kind of what I wanted it to be but couldn't seem to crank it out; but tonight I think I finally have it, I havent finished writing it but I have an outline of how things go down and it seems like exactly what I wanted without any of the awkwardness I hadn't even realized the other ending had.</li>
<li>Once I've cranked out this end chapter I'll go back to the skipped or skimmed over sections and have to make some kind of judgement about them I fear I may end up cutting two of these segments out completely even though I really wanted to include them because I think they may be causing troubles because they end up being unnescesary and more trouble than they're worth. An old english teacher once told me if I cant make something fit it might be because it is unnescesary. Always edit out anything unnescesary.</li>
</ul>Sir Ferdinand/Falsor Wing/NyuuLucyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00436742744845559533noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-752568111488019597.post-11804712820131852742010-12-07T19:04:00.001-08:002010-12-07T19:04:43.313-08:00Fuck Warm GunsHappiness is a good bookSir Ferdinand/Falsor Wing/NyuuLucyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00436742744845559533noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-752568111488019597.post-68761660121519264312010-12-02T20:02:00.000-08:002010-12-02T20:02:24.840-08:00New Profile: Proof of How Ambitious I Suddenly Am<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml> <w:WordDocument> <w:View>Normal</w:View> <w:Zoom>0</w:Zoom> <w:PunctuationKerning/> <w:ValidateAgainstSchemas/> <w:SaveIfXMLInvalid>false</w:SaveIfXMLInvalid> <w:IgnoreMixedContent>false</w:IgnoreMixedContent> <w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText>false</w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText> <w:Compatibility> <w:BreakWrappedTables/> <w:SnapToGridInCell/> <w:WrapTextWithPunct/> <w:UseAsianBreakRules/> <w:DontGrowAutofit/> <w:UseFELayout/> </w:Compatibility> <w:BrowserLevel>MicrosoftInternetExplorer4</w:BrowserLevel> </w:WordDocument> </xml><![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]><xml> <w:LatentStyles DefLockedState="false" LatentStyleCount="156"> </w:LatentStyles> </xml><![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 10]> <style>
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<ul><li> Ever since I got distracted a third of the way through writing out and arranging my profile page on hubpages I've always wished it wasn't so shitty, maybe even profesionalish.</li>
<li>Since I've finally decided that I can make a good amount of money writing these articles if I treat it like a job and consistently keep posting good new articles that are set up to actually earn some money I've started on a brand new profile-y deal desighned to entice those who see it into reading my articles as well as maybe convincing people who were interested about who wrote my articles that I'm awesome and they should read even more of my stuff.</li>
<li>Also I hear its a good idea to present yourself as a profesional as my hubs will likely be something I would point to as evidence of my valuable awesome win skills when I try and further my web writing carreeer or even regular writing.</li>
<li>I fear however that so far my urge to entertain has gotten a bit out of hand and knocked it out of the proffesional-ish seeming range.</li>
<li>This is like the first half</li>
<li>Brackets indicate what will be a hyperlink to one of my hub articles.</li>
</ul><span> </span>A freelance writer, novelist, and stand-up comedian Falsor tries to eak<span> </span>out a living until he gets his novels published and becomes a<span> </span>multi-billionaire by publishing articles here for your perusal. Writing<span> </span>mostly about stories, things he finds entertaining, and the art of<span> </span>writing itself his articles are varied in style, format, and subject<span> </span>matter. His goal (aside from ensuring he stays fed and housed) is to<span> </span>create things that readers find interesting; usually by presenting<span> </span>entertaining and (occasionally) educational groups of carefully chosen<span> </span>words arranged in an effective manner. Falsor also tires of referring to<span> </span>himself in the third person after about a paragraph or so. <br />
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</div>Since my university's english department lacked a creative writing track I settled for studying english literature and literary criticism. I found that even when the subject material was boring to me I quite enjoyed the process of analysing a work and then organizing my thoughts about it as clearly, concisely, and convinsingly as possible into academic essays such as [innisfree and haircut]. <br />
In addition to being an aspiring novelist I am a stand up comedian as well (possibly the only carreer path even more financially unsound than being a genera fiction writer; I'm a real winner) and I've posted [right field] and other stand up routines adapted for the less intimate format of an internet article as well as a number of other less formal peices I thought you might enjoy such as my [new lexicon for trash talking people] and a [list of some of my insomnia inspired epiphanies]<span> </span><br />
<span> </span>History, especially military history, has always been fascinating to me<span> </span>and I've writen a number of articles attempting to impress not just the<span> </span>dry explanation of who, what, and why things took place, but with an<span> </span>appreciation of what those events and people would have been like if you<span> </span>were there. Dunkard's Church was not just a strategic point in the<span> </span>middle of the battle of Antietem it was one of the most unholy<span> </span>shitstorms any american has ever found himself in and it lasted all day<span> </span>long. People who are bored by certain parts of history often don't<span> </span>really understand the implications of facts they hear unless they know<span> </span>how those facts came to be. For example the [casualty rates of soldiers<span> </span>in the civil war dwarf those of any other american conflict]; on its own<span> </span>this information is trivia to most people until they understand just how<span> </span>unprepared the union and confederate militaries were for the previously<span> </span>unimaginable potentcy of the weapons they were now capable of building.<span> </span>They were essentially men who were used to fighting with pistols that<span> </span>were suddenly given grenade launchers instead, but kept trying to duel<span> </span>ten paces from eachother in the middle of the street. <br />
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</div>Sir Ferdinand/Falsor Wing/NyuuLucyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00436742744845559533noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-752568111488019597.post-16042207544085425862010-12-02T17:41:00.000-08:002010-12-02T17:41:14.584-08:00My Quote For Other Inept JobhuntersI had always heard prostitution was the oldest profession I just never realized it was the <i>only</i> profession.Sir Ferdinand/Falsor Wing/NyuuLucyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00436742744845559533noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-752568111488019597.post-46106980241831629212010-12-02T17:39:00.000-08:002010-12-02T17:39:03.432-08:00The Problem of The Potential Employer Who Knows How to Interwebs<ul><li>As I stated previously I decided to set this blog aside as a place where I could just throw up whatever crap I feel like without regard for how bad it might look to most or all others. I have liked having it, even though no one really reads it posting my thoughts where anyone and everyone <i>could</i> see and read them helps me commit to them more in my own mind. Also it gives me somewhere to give into my lazyness/immature vulgarity/and impatience with grammer so I can pursue the rest of my undertakings with less fear of these things surfacing where it matters. Also its been great as a freewriting/journaling exercise.</li>
<li>Unfortunatly as my hunt for an IRL job has continued fruitlessly for months I've boned up on all the ridiculous stupid shit one needs to do to make it seem as though they are the second coming of christ risen again specifically for the purpose of being the greatest employee the prospective employer could have ever fathomed. I've even managed to mostly get over my distaste for the hoop jumping, I'll play the game because goddamnit I have to I need a job and if thats how to get one I'll do it to the best of my abilities.</li>
<li>I mention this in relation to my unencumbered blog here because I know know a potential employer is likely to E-stalk me to try and asses me based on my facebook page/twitter/other websites and whatnot. This unfortunatly means that I really should go over every inch of my online presence and sanitize and polish it in the same way I have to portray myself in the real world around potential employers so it says nothing about me except that I'd be a great employee for them.</li>
<li>This makes me sad, a prospective employer might very well decide that someone who posts on the internet about how he guages fart odor is not the mature kind of individual they would like to hire. I don't want to have to play the good missionary boy in every aspect of my life especially here on the internet. That would be so boring I tire of the whitewash routine.</li>
</ul>Sir Ferdinand/Falsor Wing/NyuuLucyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00436742744845559533noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-752568111488019597.post-3445780593219891352010-05-09T18:35:00.000-07:002010-05-09T23:29:49.113-07:00Fart Guaging For The Anosmic<ul><li>Anosmia is the lack of a sense of smell. It is what Dewy Cox has refered to as, "Goin' nose blind."</li>
<li>I am anosmic though occasionally and for no adequately explained reason I can smell things; occasionally the things I smell are not present like nose hallucinations.</li>
<li>With no sense of smell I cannot tell how bad my farts smell though I believe there is a correlation between the stinkyness of my farts and how warm my butt feels when I fart.</li>
<li>Do other people notice any such relation? Research and understanding of butt warmth/foul odor correlation will be invaluable to my efforts to warn nearby individuals of impending methane exposure.</li>
<li>hmmm perhaps I should ask a biologist about possible sensory reaction to methane density aside from its distinctive odor.</li>
</ul><ul><li>Also worthy of note: I never really thought farts smell bad, maybe that's a learned behavior. They always seem kind of warm and earthy; I found the smell reassuring really. </li>
</ul><ul><li>Apparently women have migraines more than twice as often as men. Sister's can't catch a break. Don't take this the wrong way, but I'm sure glad I don't have to put up with the shit women do.</li>
</ul><ul><li>Hmmm I'm about halfway through 27 Dresses and so far I'm really liking it; I like Fevered Pitch, but that was fine it's kind of about baseball and has a comedian in it. 27 Dresses has the guy who plays the X-Man nobody likes the best part of the movies was him finally getting blown the fuck up. I'm not a homophobe but american culture is so I really don't want to be "the guy who secretly likes chick flicks" it would be very inconvenient.</li>
</ul><ul><li>"all successful artifacts are outcomes of cumulative improvements." is your quote for the day.</li>
<li>"All artifacts are fucked up repetedly until tthey aren't fucked up." is the paraphrase of the day. </li>
<li> I have to amend that paraphrase. some things are fucked up until the creator says fuck it and sells it anyway.</li>
</ul><ul></ul><ul></ul><ul></ul><ul></ul>Sir Ferdinand/Falsor Wing/NyuuLucyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00436742744845559533noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-752568111488019597.post-30013564164901632842010-05-07T18:40:00.000-07:002011-10-20T20:45:30.955-07:00News on el Book<ul><li>Well I now have a beggining middle and end outlined for not one but two books. I've been focusing pretty exclusively on the first book for fairly obvious reasons.</li>
<li>The current stage of the writing process is exciting, fun, liberating, and scary.</li>
<li>I just go through the innards deciding how I can do each stage of the story to provide maximum awesome/make sense which is fun.</li>
<li>at the same time this is my greatest chance to fail to make it any good.</li>
<li>I'm worried it is going to be longer than publishers want it to be. </li>
</ul>Sir Ferdinand/Falsor Wing/NyuuLucyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00436742744845559533noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-752568111488019597.post-73193310552928284512010-05-04T23:20:00.000-07:002010-05-04T23:53:16.682-07:00More Musings (mmmm aliteration)<ul><li>After I posted my article on ADHD I ended up doing more research on it than I have in a while because I was whoring for backlinks on related sites.</li>
<li>So far the knowledge gained has been worth more than the approximatly zero links I ended up getting.</li>
<li>now I have cool terms like "difficulty self-initiating" I know exactly what that means, now I just has a better sounding explanation for it than. "I'm not sure, I sat down to do it and looked at the paper... and then didn't do it..."</li>
<li>For some reason discovery of a term for it has led to my creating methods for dealing with it. I knew of the phenomenon and hadn't been able to come up with much but I learned some shiney multi-sylabic words and presto.</li>
<li>one of the methods is to ensure I'm rockin' happy when I start: cue Nightwish Gundam AMV.</li>
<li>I might post more articles about ADHD as a result, though no one fucking reads the first one. </li>
<li>http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dVfOcqRN2xY&feature=related</li>
</ul><ul><li>If you're ever in a band named Nightwish never change your lead singer, at least a million percent of your fans will never get over it .</li>
</ul><ul><li>What do commandos call walking around without underwear? </li>
</ul><ul></ul><ul></ul>Sir Ferdinand/Falsor Wing/NyuuLucyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00436742744845559533noreply@blogger.com0